Child’s Play (Netflix Review)

Image result for child's play 1988

18 – 87mins – 1988


 

BATTERIES NOT INSERTED

“Hey, wanna play?!”

The Conjuring‘s breakout star Annabelle – who has since been granted not one but two origin stories, reviewed HERE and HERE – may have recently reawakened the public’s fear in perturbed porcelain playthings, but the first toy to terrorise audiences (and court controversy for allegedly invoking violence in children) was creator Don Mancini’s possessed Good Guys doll, who over a near 20-year period has headlined a further six supernatural serial-killing sequels.

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ZAPPED, 2.4 – “Pear Fair” (TV Review)

Zapped. Barbara (Sharon Rooney).

Dave – 9:40pm – Thursday 2nd November 2017

Available to stream NOW on UKTV Play

Created and written by: Dan Gaster, Will Ing and Paul Powell

Directed by: Dave Lambert


 

PEARS BE WITH YOU

“May your pear juice be sweet.”

When two pear watch guards (Simon Day and Javone “Empty Orchestra” Prince) are inexplicably fired the day before Munty’s highly anticipated Pear Fair, a baffled Brian (James Buckley) jumps at the opportunity to apply for the job of guarding the sacred albino pears in the walled orchard. With his wages, he plans to journey to the City of a Thousand Towers in time for the Super Solstice, hoping to take advantage of the thin wall between worlds and return to his rightful dimension.

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Happy Death Day (Cinema Review)

15 – 100mins – 2017


 

TOMORROW ALWAYS DIES

Openly acknowledging its similarity to a charming early-90s cult classic in a meta closing exchange in which protagonist Tree Gelbman (Jessica Rothe) claims, rather unfathomably, to never have heard of the film nor star Bill Ghostbusters Murray (as if!), Happy Death Day is unabashedly Groundhog Day given a Scream-esque slasher reimagining.

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RED DWARF XII.4 – “Mechocracy” (TV Review)

Dave – 9:00pm – Thursday 2nd November 2017

Available to stream NOW on UKTV Play

Created by: Rob Grant and Doug Naylor

Written and directed by: Doug Naylor


 

ROBOT REVOLUTION

Last week’s bold, PC-satirising shenanigans certainly divided the hardcore fanbase (read my review of “Timewave” HERE), although overnight numbers have confirmed that audience figures for Dave’s flagship original (re-) commission went UP for last night’s broadcast on the official home of witty banter, so I’m hoping all new boarders who alighted upon the good ship Red Dwarf stick around for this week’s far superior slice of sci-fi sitcommery.

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The Ritual (Cinema Review)

15 – 94mins – 2017


 

FEAR THE FOREST

While big money genre tentpoles like Blade Runner 2049 and It will always garner the most fanfare, sometimes the real cinematic gems are the smaller features released with only minimum fuss and which, sadly, often leave theatres before word of mouth has had a chance to take full effect. Say hello to The Ritual, which at time of typing is clinging on at my local Cineworld with just one late screening in only its second week. However, if you read this in time I cannot recommend this creepy chiller enough, so please hot-foot it down to your local picture house and take a walk in these woods…

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Thor: Ragnarok (Cinema Review)

12A – 130mins – 2017 – 3D


 

GLADIA-THOR, READY? REVENGERS, READY?

In recent years, Disney and Marvel have become notorious for the short leashes on which they keep their directors. Even if your name is Edgar Baby Driver Wright, if your Ant Man passion project doesn’t toe the corporate line, you’re out. Likewise, Lord and Miller were recently ousted from the Han Solo Star Wars spin-off because their take on the Kasdan’s script was too irreverent. The body double twist which capped off Iron Man 3 was derided for making a mockery of Marvel lore, while Joss Whedon has openly held his hands up to the difficult production on 2015’s Age of Ultron, a sequel which too often went for a gag.

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ZAPPED, 2.3 – “The Party” (TV Review)

Zapped.

Dave – 9:40pm – Thursday 26th October 2017

Available NOW to stream on UKTV Play

Created and written by: Dan Gaster, Will Ing, Paul Powell

Directed by: Dave Lambert


 

RICH TASTES

Halfway through this second series and stranded twenty-first century everyman Brian Weaver (James Charlie Countryman Buckley) is becoming bored with his limited circle of less-than-exceptional companions and his lacklustre new existence in the fantastical medieval province. Even news of Herman’s (Louis Emerick) upcoming anniversary party celebrating 15 years of “proper old school taverny” at The Jug and Other Jug can’t convince Brian to stay away from Munty’s newly-opened trendy bar.

… Keep Scuttling!