15 – 85mins – 1986
FURRY FANGED FOOTBALLS
The Brown family’s rural Kansas farmhouse is about to become the chomping ground of a horde of hungry, malevolent alien vermin in this quintessentially 80s sci-fi/horror comedy, which plays out like Gremlins meets Ghoulies – with a multitude of iconic pop culture references thrown in for good measure!
… Keep Scuttling!
15 – 95mins – 2016
“It seems reports of your demise have been greatly exaggerated…”
A sequel no-one asked for to a remake everyone bar the biggest Jason Statham fans had forgotten about, Mechanic: Resurrection somehow managed to outgross its 2011 predecessor and more than triple its $40million budget when it landed at the box office last August. The Stath’s endearing mug no doubt managed to persuade both action-mad lads and charmed lasses alike into multiplexes, but this follow-up to Simon West’s Charles Brosnan re-do is surprisingly heavyweight in the casting department.
… Keep Scuttling!
PG – 94mins – 1992
THE CRIMSON PIG
“I don’t fight for honour – I fight for a pay check!”
Italian WWI ex-fighter pilot Marco Rossolini (Michael Keaton) is an anti-fascist now living as a hostage-rescuing freelance bounty hunter, spending his days chasing “air pirates” in his Savoia S.21 above the Adriatic Sea. Written and directed by Studio Ghibli head Hayao Miyazaki, Porco Rosso is based on his own 3-part Manga, Hikōtei Jidai, and could easily pass as an ode to history and aviation, were it not for the fact that the lead character is cursed by “divine punishment” into the form of an anthropomorphised pig!
“God was telling you it wasn’t your time yet…”
Despite this single concession to fantasy, Porco Rosso is otherwise fairly geographically and historically accurate, with a surplus of politically-charged dialogue giving it the air of a satire. It’s a pity that a succession of “outsider” quips and tiresome “pig-headed” wordplay diminishes any deeper and more complex subtext by overstating the ‘pigs might fly’ comedy. In my opinion, that’s a single joke stretched waaaay too far.
Elsewhere there are flashes of sensitivity and sympathy (“Maybe I’ve just run out of tears,”), even if Keaton dubs Rocco with suave indifference. Irritatingly, there are also further glimpses of some outmoded sexism (“Don’t you have any males relatives?”; “We’re not baking a cake here,”) – but at least, unlike Ocean Waves, this was set in a less open-minded time period.
As is to be expected from the Japanese anime giants, the film is animated gorgeously, however some overly cartoonified injury detail does diminish the honour of Porco’s climatic dual-cum-bareknuckle-fistfight with love rival Curtis (Cary Saw Elwes). Nevertheless, Porco Rosso’s charm carries it through; this is still more swell than swill – and I’m not bacon that up! Ahem.
CR@B’s Claw Score: